Happy New Year!

I really haven't updated in a long time. I've been so busy! (笑)

Or maybe a little too lazy? (>_<)

A new year has begun and I feel like I haven't accomplished enough in the past few months!

I'm very glad though, that I haven't been completely idle. I'm grateful for the chance to work and earn money, because a lot of people are really struggling.

I must admit, though, that I do want a steadier job, even though I know that being a cashier has improved my disposition and attitude towards working. I'm glad to know from others that I've made their days brighter, and that I make people happy. The work environment also appeals so much to me that I wish I could be here for much, much longer. But I know it probably won't be permanent, and I'll have to shift somewhere else after a while. I don't want to depend on retail jobs so much anymore, as it drains a lot from the soul. Plus, as a cashier, I'm so restricted to the cash register and don't get to help people with books or merchandise as much as I'd like to.

Also, since I started work, I feel like I really haven't had enough time to do the things I wanted to accomplish. Whenever I come home from the city, it ends up being quite late. Also, I have to accompany my mom to fetch my aunt almost every night, and the back-and-forth trip takes about an hour, so that's an hour of my time taken away almost every night. In addition, it drains me of a lot of energy especially since my aunt works so late. (>_<);; I know it's not her fault and I shouldn't really blame anyone for my lack of time, but seriously, I cannot help but feel as though my own family is draining me of every spare moment I desire to use for my own little projects and needs.

It doesn't help that every time I get a day off, that day gets filled with chores that they decide to bombard on me. So it's draining in every possible sense: physically, mentally, even emotionally, I guess.

I'm sorry to sound so whiny on my first post of the year, but I guess I haven't had much time to think about this, either.

I've been feeling a lot more headaches and pains lately, even double vision. and I'm starting to be afraid that I'm also sacrificing my health for all this. I've always believed in balancing things out and I've always been confident that I've handled stress well in the past. Now, I'm not so sure (T.T);

I can feel my head swimming, even now. (>_<)

I guess this means it's time for some New Year's Resolutions? (笑)

1.) I will eat properly.
By this I mean I will also cut costs and start eating more food at home than out in the city. And by eating food at home I don't mean making instant noodles. (笑) I've said I wanted to lower my sweet intake, and honestly, this is one of the most difficult things I've had to promise myself. I need to control myself more, considering how quickly I manage to consume a box of cookies. (笑)

2.) I will have some form of good exercise every day, even if it's just a few push-ups, some ballet exercises, or even jumping jacks.
Ideally, I would have music to dance to every morning. That would be a good way to start the day.

3.) Read more books.
And by this I mean actual books, like classics, bestsellers, et cetera. I bought an e-reader expressly for this purpose, and I think I've been getting some good use out of it (^^)

4.) Write and draw more.
At least once a week I should have a few drawings completed, and some more ideas jotted down for the stories in my head. I have three different genres to write for, and I know my manga has not been properly drawn or planned out! I have to accomplish something this year! Ideally, I should have a chapter of the manga out every month. I'll see how far I can go~

5.) Following that, I will need to study my Japanese in earnest.
I have everything at my fingertips and I should not hesitate to use them.

6.)All in all...I need to take care of myself.
Because looking back, I have been very lucky in life, even if I'm not exactly where I want to be. And even though I'm not, I have the ability to get to where I want to be, if I only pick myself up and go towards it.

So I will.

I think, in the middle of everything, I've forgotten what it means to be strong. And forgotten the source of my strength.

So I'm going back.

Music, words, prayers.

I need to bring it all back.

To anyone who still passes through and reads, and checks this blog, thank you and I love you.

明けましておめでとうございます！今年もよろしくおねがいします！
皆さん、一緒に頑張りましょう!

[Happy New Year! Please be kind to me this year as well. Everyone, let's work hard together!]